They're meant to be there, they are fixing the roof but i'm terrified. This is the first time i've been alone in the house with them around and i'm all shaky and nervous. I'm very scared to leave the house incase they see me so i've basically been hiding in the front room with the curtains closed. They're making really loud banging noises and things and it's really freaking me out :( Whenever they talk to each other my heart skips a beat. They're going to be here for another week, but hopefully i won't be left alone with them again.
Also the front door has to stay open because they're using our plug sockets and it's cold! The poor dogs are going to have to wait until they've left for the day to have their afternoon walk because obviously i can't leave the house with the door open.
I've been photographing clothes to pop on my blog sale, i was wondering if maybe i should send the portion of the proceeds to Chile instead of Haiti now, i've already sent £30 from the sale to Haiti so maybe i should give some to Chile now? Anyone have any thoughts on the matter?
I'm really failing at my No-buy :( I just can't help buying stuff, it really is an addiction. I'm trying so, so hard though. I bought a few bits last week with some discount codes, but now i have even more codes and i'm scared i won't be able to keep myself from using them. I think i've worked out the root of my shopping addiction and it scares me a lot. I realised that i think what i own sort of defines me and if it weren't for the stuff i have people wouldn't like me or think i'm interesting. I know this sounds utterly ridiculous, and in my head i know it's not true but i think it's a deep seated thing in my head. It probably relates to my social phobia. When i had cognitive behaviour therapy for my phobia a few years ago my therapist (who was useless) kept going on and on about how i dress (which really irritated me) and i had to try and work out why i dress so 'outrageously' when i'm so shy. I couldn't fully work it out, but i thought of a few reasons.
1. There might be no reason at all, i just like what i like.
2. I dress the way i do because it creates a sort of 'front' to keep people away, because some people can get a bad impression of me because i look so silly.
3. Because i can't express myself like ordinary people, by talking to people, i express myself through the way i look.
Hmm that was all a bit morose wasn't it?
Here's a photo of me from last spring (i was so thin back then D: want to get back to that size please body!) in an outfit i love: