The Makeup Critic

You may have seen this blog on some posts already. Basically it's some horrid person insulting beauty bloggers because they dare not do their makeup how it 'should' be done. It's stupid and mean and basically pointless except for insulting people for spurious reasons like their nails aren't absolutely perfectly manicured.

The writer is not a proper makeup artist or cosmotologist (though apparently her and doesn't seem to know much about makeup herself. She doesn't share any of her own looks, and the only tips she gives are tired old beauty 'rules' you read in every magazine, dictating what makeup should be like. And some of her advice is just incorrect.  The blog is not helpful, it's just mean. 

But.... God is it funny.

I can understand why some of my featured friends found the nasty criticism written about them hurtful, it really is horrible that someone would take the time to just criticise and bitch about things like that. But... God it's so stupid and funny!  She knows NOTHING! She's basically insulting beauty bloggers without even understanding what beauty blogs actually do. And she has very limited knowledge about actual beauty practices. She doesn't know what the point of 

FOTDs is, doesn't know why someone would show nail polish swatches, doesn't know what a cut-crease is, think nails breathe, etc etc.

What I find particularly funny is that the writer has only the shakiest grasp of the English language. The blog reads like one of those spam emails about a Nigerian dictator leaving you money in their will. Now I don't think there's anything wrong with not knowing English perfectly, God knows I couldn't write anything in a different language, but when your entire blog is basically saying 'you shouldn't write a blog about things you're not a complete expert at' then the ridiculous grammar mistakes and incorrectly used words sort of work against that point :P Her overuse of 'qualitative' is particularly hilarious, she doesn't use it correctly a single time! Some sentences are completely incomprehensible.

It's also funny because, like I said earlier, she doesn't actually seem to know a lot about makeup. Lots of her 'tips' are either incorrect or just stupidly dated. And the thing I find funniest is that she claims her posts are good for the bloggers they insult. That she's just kindly giving them some tips.

Criticism as a whole is not bad. Constructive criticism can be very helpful, and even vital. And I have no problem with snark, where the criticism isn't really constructive but it's used for humour. There's also a lot to be said for criticism where it's really deserved, towards liars, cheats and so on. But this blog is is just bitchiness, aimed at people who haven't done anything wrong, very poorly disguised as advice.

The whole point of her 'critiques' (which is really just her excuse for writing a blog full of petty insults) is that if you're not an expert you shouldn't do tutorials, or even just share your makeup, which really goes against the whole idea of beauty blogging. Of course there are some professional makeup artists who have blogs, but the majority are girls who just love makeup and want to share what they love, what works for them and any tips they might have. I actually prefer reading blogs written by non-professionals because I'm not a makeup artist myself. My needs are different than what a makeup artist needs and my skill with makeup is nowhere near their level, so it would be very difficult to pull off a lot of professional techniques and looks. So I prefer to read advice from people like me, who just have a passion for painting their face and whose looks I might actually have a chance of replicating. If only experts are allowed to blog there would be basically no baking blogs (only bakers could share recipes), no weight-loss blogs (only professional fitness instructors should write diet advice) and only a few makeup blogs, most of which would use products out of my price range.

She also thinks that if your makeup is 'perfect' then you have no right to be showing it at all.

I am under no illusions that my makeup is 'perfect'. I very rarely do tutorials because I do not feel that I am qualified to tell people how to do their makeup as I'm well aware that I don't know how to do everything in the 'proper' way.  I do it how it works for me, whether that means using a tiny concealer brush to apply my foundation, occassionally using sponge applicators, wearing colours that don't quite suit my skintone or forgoing eye primer because I am forgetful and damn lazy. Why do I share it at all then? Because I want to. It's fun. I don't expect anyone to look at my blog and assume I am a proper makeup artist and they should be copying my looks. But I think some of my ideas are fun and interesting and mostly I just share because this is MY BLOG. It's a personal thing for me to do what I want and I'm not ashamed to show how I look.

And what exactly is 'perfect' makeup? I would say my favourite makeup artist is Alex Box, I think her looks are just stunning. Look at this:

I would say this is 'perfectly done'. But I'm sure lots of people would disagree. It's over the top and fantastical and it would be hard to find an occaision suitable for such a look.

Wayne Goss just today said that to him this is 'perfect':

The skin is flawless and the look is natural and conventionally attractive. But to me it's a little dull.

Maybe my friend Mikey's makeup is perfect?

...Ok so that's a no :P

But my point is, if makeup is an 'art' as the blogger claims, then there cannot be any 'perfect' makeup. Art is by it's own nature subjective. Everyone has different ideas on what is 'good' art and NO-ONE'S opinion is correct.

There is no such thing as 'perfect'. There is no such thing as 'normal'. Everything is subjective. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. 

And even if there was such a thing as perfection, the idea that you shouldn't share things because they're not perfect is moronic. Where would we be in life if everyone acted like that? No-one would share ideas, they'd basically be no art, music, film etc. Also how will you ever become better at what you do if you don't share? As an artist I know my work isn't perfect, but I'm still going to show it to people and appreciate the compliments I get and think about the constructive criticism I'm given. If I'd never shared anything I would never have grown.

When she discusses the fact that makeup shouldn't have rules she says: “Yes, make up has no strict rules, but there are some guidelines to help avoid the most serious mistakes and did not look ridiculous and unnatural.” (although she then goes on to say some bloggers have failed the 'rules')

But I WANT to look ridiculous and unnatural! A mistake for me would be 'my lips but better' lippie on,  french tipped nails, brown mascara etc because I wouldn't feel pretty or comfortable. But is that sort of makeup a mistake for everyone? Of course not.  Do what you want, it's your face! Makeup is worn for so many different reasons, you can't apply the same rules of makeup to, for instance, a drag act or performance artist than you can to a woman who just wants to look good for work. And there should be no rules anyway. NONSENSE NONSENSE NONSENSE!

In a way I don't want to feed the troll by posting this and pointing you towards the blog, but some of the comments on her blog are wonderful, heartwarming and exciting. 

If you've been featured on her blog, or if it happens in the future, I can imagine how hurtful it would be, but try and look at it this way: How much bravery does it take to start a blog, never show any of your own work and basically anonymously (while her name is there there is no indication it's her, any talk of her life and the photo thats supposed to be her looks very much like a stock image) slag people off? She's not doing anything constructive, she's just insulting people who dare to put their faces out in the world and share their creativity. 

All the people she's insulted have thousands of followers and huge amounts of postive comments, so obviously they're doing something right! All she's got is a bunch of people who hate her for being a nasty critical person. Also seeing as she's so mean we have an excuse to laugh at her amazing destruction of the English language. 

I really hope that she genuinely doesn't understand how meanspirited and bitchy she comes across as and that after she's read all the comments on her blog she will rethink what she's doing. If not then she's just an idiotic butthole.